Tuesday, May 12, 2009

We Used to Have Sex

This is an anonymous submission to CocktailOur. The writer is sharing her story, wondering if you've ever felt this way, or been that dude?
Has this ever happened to you? LoL story of your life?

We Used to Have Sex. . .

He comes up behind me in the club, and I smell him before I see him.
His scent is oh so familiar.
Thought I smelled him last week, felt my heart skip a beat like “oh shit!” but when I turned around it wasn’t him. “whew! dodged that one” I thought.
This time there was no mistaking him as he eased up behind me and slightly grazed his hand against my behind as he bends down to say hello in my ear. It’s loud in here.
“Hey” I say and try to smile.
Damn, did he have to do that? Why does the sight of him always remind me of last summer? Last summer. . . yeah, good times.
And now it’s almost summer again, but we haven’t done those summertime things in a while. Not since the last time it was hot outside.

When he’s near, my mind always floods with memories of looking up at the mirrors as we lay, thinking “so that’s what this looks like...” His reflection was hot to say the least. Laying there contemplating “How do I get him. . . to do more than just this?”
We used to have sex and that’s all it was. Understood by both of us. I don’t think I ever wanted more from him other than in just those times when I lay there in his bed after we were both spent.

And so here we are in the same spot, standing side by side.
Accidentally brushing against each other as he talks to his homeboys and I dance with my girls... We don’t really talk, but every now and then our eyes make contact and I know that he remembers too.

Then it’s me, him and his homeboy outside. We’re talking about nothing, just shooting the breeze and getting some air.
Enjoying his presence, kinda of wondering what he’s doing when he gets out of here.
Contemplating recycling our summertime fling.
But only for a second, because then he ruins it. I’m brought back to reality and reminded why it never went any further than it did. And our only escapades were soley in the bedroom.
I think he was trying to pay a compliment to me, but his words only show how little he actually knows about me beyond those sweaty sheets and king sized mirrors...
He says to his friend “yeah she got that exotic pussy”.

And it all comes crashing down... the fantasy, respect and anything else I may have romanticized about him beyond just a good lay.

I can’t get with that. It’s not me.
And this is why we USED TO have sex. . . that’s the only me he knew. The one that I created for him. The exotic chick I used to play for him ;)


Ashley said...


Anonymous said...

Great read!

Sartorially Savvy said...

Sometimes it be's like that...

cocktailour said...

And just where have you been Mr. Savvy?

CocktailTee said...

Yes, Savvy we've missed your comments! Don't go away for so long again :P

jessica said...

really good read...